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False daygame dichotomies

I stopped a colorful-looking girl today.

It turned out she’s a teacher.

She was happy and ready to talk.

But I wasn’t feeling I had done enough for attraction.

So I eventually shook her hand, and moved on.

Because sometimes it’s better to preserve your state than to force a close.

At least, that’s what I remember reading in a post that Krauser had written once, based on the one-on-one coaching he took with Yad.

The thing is, I’m also kind of a masochist.

I like to tell myself I should always try harder.

If it doesn’t sting, it means I’m probably not doing enough.

But you can’t live like this. Not all the time. And yet, you also have to force yourself sometimes, and suffer the sting.

I believe there are many “false dichotomies” in the world.

In reality, these are complex, tangled problems. The solutions genuinely swing between two opposite poles at different times.

But because our minds like simplicity, we want to reduce the number of solutions to one.

Not two.

One.

And that’s why your mind might like to say, “I always have to live outside my comfort zone…”

Or it might like to say, “I can’t or won’t do this because it’s too uncomfortable.”

Neither of these is TRUE. Not all the time.

But our minds would like to have use believe that one or the other is true, or at least right for us.

Because it takes energy and thought to figure out which solution might be right for you at this specific moment.

But keeping both solutions in mind, and spending the time and energy to consider them both, is the only way to make progress. And to be able to keep making progress for a long time to come.

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Is this the best stationary daygame opener?

Here’s a problem:

I only really feel comfortable approaching girls using the Yad stop.

It’s not a HUGE problem, because most girls in the city are walking. But not all.

Some are sitting. Some are standing around.

Now it seems like the typical daygame routine would work just as well on stationary girls. And I have used it, and it can work.

But I also feel like there’s something off.

I just watched a video from Yad where he’s basically saying, “Don’t go direct in your opener with stationary girls.”

Instead, says Yad, use a cheeky situational opener (“Is this the best coffee shop in all of New York?”) and count on your vibe to make it clear to the girl there’s something sexy going on.

I’ll have to try this.

But I’m still not 100% convinced.

Because another master of daygame, Jim Camp, will tell you that in any negotiation, you don’t ever want to take away your adversary’s right to say no.

If you do, you make them uncomfortable. And you won’t reach a long-term solution that way.

Stopping a girl who’s walking on the street completely preserves her right to say no. She can always say, “Thank, but I’ve really got to go.” And then she can leave.

Not so with a stationary girl. So how to preserve her right to say no, without weakly verbalizing it? I don’t know, but I’ll keep searching for an answer.

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Scarcity and the middle-of-the-road approach

She was coming towards me again.

I’d seen her earlier, on the other side of the road, while I was walking through the park. I didn’t approach then.

But now, here she was again, coming up towards me on the street.

She was a large and sexy girl, wearing a blue summer dress. Her giant tits and her giant ass were bouncing violently as she marched down the street.

I let her pass by me and then I turned after her.

She was about to hit an intersection.

I ran to catch her in the few yards of remaining space, but…

She started to cross the street sideways, even before hitting the intersection. And she practically ran into me while I was trying to get in front of her.

So I stopped her right there, in the middle of the road.

“Hello. I just want to tell you one thing.”

She was a little bit amused and a great deal confused. I couldn’t get her to stay there in the middle of the road with me.

So why am I bringing this up?

I just watched a section of the Daygame Blueprint where Yad says he will stalk the girl, following her until he find a good spot to approach. It’s just a reflection of the abundance mindset he’s got.

And I think that’s right.

But I’m not in abundance right now. I’m in scarcity. And stalking girls will make it more likely I get awkward and nervous… or even cop out altogether.

So in these early days, it’s better to have stupid mid-road approaches, than to pretend that I am more successful and accomplished than I actually am.

And if you are not yet at Yad’s level, or somewhere close, then maybe you too should consider approaching girls as soon as you can, instead of waiting for the optimal situation.

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The missing ingredient when girls ignore you on the street

Two girls ignored me today.

I approached one of them on a small side street. I had to jog after her a good distance. Eventually, I got in front of her and said, “Excutes me.”

“Yes,” she said as she walked around me.

“I just want to tell you one thing.”

She kept walking. “I’m in a hurry.”

The other girl was walking slowly on one of the main streets. I got in front of her. “What?” she barked at me.

“I wanted to tell you that you look nice.”

“Thank you,” she said with a scowl and walked on.

I’ve been practicing my approaches, and I’ve been working on two things:

Smiling.

And having good eye contact.

Which are both important. But not 100% enough.

There’s another critical thing which I was reminded of today as I was rewatching the Daygame Blueprint.

“You need 100% conviction,” says Yad.

That’s a vague inner game thing but it matters. In practical terms, it means you have to get all the way in front of the girl… fully intercepting her path (“standing on her rails”)… and in a way, blocking out the sun with your magnificence.